By Dwight Jenkins
PROMPT—During Covid-19 ...
Not sure Mom why I thought you’d give me notice when you were ready to die. You’ve left a deep hole in my heart, I tell you no lie.
Mom now that you’re gone, I guess better not put off talking to you for another day.
Hope it’s not too late to tell you how much I really appreciate how you worked throughout your life to show me the way.
Mom did I ever tell you when I was a child I viewed you as God—always present, always conscious, always powerful. It was you who first taught me right from wrong.
As a child, I felt the closeness of your love—closer than that of a Siamese twin. It was you who taught me there is such a thing as sin.
For some who don’t know, they may say you completed your life. They don’t understand the impact you had on this adult child’s life. They don’t understand what it is to be no longer anyone’s son. They don’t know what it’s like to not be anyone’s child.
The cut this time is more severe than the cut of my umbilical cord. This time the cut feels like you cut a piece of my soul.
This time around it’s hard to feel whole.
And I remembered while sitting at your table, regarding my culture, I guess I was a little remiss. You reminded me I was not just a Canadian boy, I needed to try Ackee and Salt Fish—a West Indian dish.
I recall emblematic of your years of sacrifice, although weak in the joints, you took time to create a picture of me, your lawyer son and enshrined it in one of your needle points.
You demonstrated lessons of simplicity and discipline. You too taught us expressions of wisdom like, ”When your friend becomes your foe, all the world your business will know.” You gave them to us so we’d make no bad judgments to be categorized as guilty symptoms.
And Mom even during adversity, like Mother Theresa, you showed how much you valued human dignity.
Your hair always in place, your appearance proper before you would answer my knock. It’s as if each day you were preparing for the time the angels would bring you ashore, knowing God wants to share you with others.
Mom you don’t need to answer the door anymore.
Mom’s not properly dressed. She won’t be answering the door anymore.
Mom won’t be answering the door anymore.
I’m not sure where you go now nor for how long. But I hope God tells you, you have a son that values sacrifice, integrity and dignity as you did. And He and I will make sure your actions and words live on for an eternity.
I love you Mom.
Dwight Jenkins is a former Criminal and Immigration lawyer who was born in Montreal and presently lives in Ajax, Ontario. Dwight aspires to write spiritual, cultural and political poetry, elegies, odes and devotionals. Dwight practices different aspects of both the Hindu and Catholic religion. Dwight enjoys participating in open mic performances which at times include dance and song.
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